Dear God,
Please send help fast.
No, it's not your average emergency, and I know that you have plenty of bigger things going on in the world that I normally pray for, but this two year old is testing me at every turn. My Mother constantly told me that "patience is a virtue" when I was growing up. I'm reminding myself of that more times than I can count these days.
The struggle between learning, communicating, independence and you know your standard #2yearoldproblems is caving in on Cameron. There's an on/off switch that seems to follow in his shadow. If only I could see it, then at least I'd be warned about what I was getting into before I got into it.
Between bath times, getting dressed, going to sleep, being inside or outside, going to school, saying thank you, choosing socks, putting the socks on himself -- I can go on. and on. Literally you name it and we've had a struggle with it.
Don't get me wrong Lord, I love this little boy to the moon and back, he's a joy and so full of personality. Watching him learn how to voice his worries, how to express his emotions, how to grow from here, has Tim and I - to put it simply - whooped.
Can I make you a deal, I'll pony up to the temper tantrums and try every last method I know of to better these struggles to help Cameron grow into the man that I know he can be, if you'll help me keep him asleep until it's time for him to wake up? FOUR THIRTY in the morning is just not healthy for this family. FOUR THIRTY is no good. He used to be such a great sleeper, and now all of a sudden we've hit a huge pot hole. We're so close to putting baby in his crib and sleeping in his own bed, which will get us that much closer to him sleeping through the night. I'm terrified of doing this though knowing that Cameron's sleep patterns are not at their strongest.
Ok forget the deal. Just help us all to remember that, yes, patience is a virtue. Keep us united and as always supporting each other - Team Benton Forever! Above all else though, remind us of the love more than the tantrums, smiles more than sadness and laughter more than tears.
Don't worry God, I'll be saying my "normal" prayers tonight too. You know the ones that are truly important. This little prayer is starting to sound like a pity party. Thanks for letting me vent a little. I don't believe in white-picket-fence perfect; I know better than that. Besides, I believe that chaotic beauty is much brighter than anything that resembles a white picket fence anyway. Chaotic beauty creates the best kind of laughter and memories. Ok just that rant right there helped; see I just needed to let it out. I now realize that I sound exactly like the crazy, sleep deprived mother of a 2 year old and an infant -- but I need to remember that I'm not the first one in this category. Life will progress.
Thank you for listening,
Amen
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