Lately

We've been playing with friends!

We've been making funny faces.

We've laughed with family.

We may have had a little issue with a car door. Don't worry, everything is fine now.

We've tried our hand at a baseball game. And we've realized we're still more interested in everything else around us.

We've even started watching some cartoons together!

Lately I've been:

Making:  easy dinners. and I've become more of a fan of breakfast for dinner every so often!

Drinking:  coffee, water (x5ish) and repeat. unless it's a weekend and then throw in a some beer, wine or margaritas at the end of the rotation.

Reading:  I Like You Just the Way I Am by Jenny Mollen - a sassy, Klassy (yes, that's a capital K) that's pretty comical.

Wanting: to find somewhere amazing to go celebrate a DECADE of marriage with Tim. Sometimes the world wide web is helpful and sometimes it feels like a pit that you get sucked into and waste time.

Watching:  debating between The Good Wife and Breaking Bad - both recommendations from my Mama.

Eating:  lots of salad, tacos and yup, you guessed it - granola bars. We're creatures of habit. 

Smelling:  Fresh air, soaking it all in.

Wishing:  for peace and healing for all those that are searching for it.  I tend to maintain my positivity for the most part. Thank goodness I was raised with the glass half full, but I know that's not always easy for other people - especially those that are going through struggles.

Enjoying:  the 9 o'clock hour that Tim and I get to spend together. even if it is doing dishes, laundry or cleaning up.

Loving:  our nightly story time. Sure, it's repetitive, but hearing Cameron read stories to us that he's heard a million times and now knows by heart is just about the best thing in the world!

Hoping:  for a relaxing weekend.

Needing:  things to stay as is or grow from here, no need to rock the boat too much in any direction because we are getting back into a groove. and in my book, groove is a really good feeling.

Feeling:  excited for some upcoming visits! We've got family coming next weekend and then others coming in 2 weeks or so!  Payton is finally going to get to meet some of these crazy people that we love some much and are lucky enough to call family!

Wearing:  my new shirt that says "Mother of Dragons".  all.the.time.  It's turned into my Saturday morning shirt. It's pretty straight forward! haha!

Noticing:  People lately. Life happening in all forms. I try and notice what I think my kids notice; I'll be honest, sometimes their world seems so much nicer. 

Bookmarking:  good ideas for Christmas presents. I can't believe it's right around the corner. sheesh!

A Never Ending Letter to My Boys and A Reminder to Myself

To The Brothers Benton:

Family Always Comes First; Brothers for life.  

You Will:  fight and argue, be competitive and have your own interests.  

You Will:  always be brothers and you will always have each others back. period.

You Will:  Never. ever. date the same girl. Don't even think about it!

You Will:  be friends.

You Will:  Always love and cherish each other.

You Will:  work hard. do things that you don't like to do. fight for what you believe in. and always treat people with kindness & respect.

You Will:  probably try to share homework.

You Will:  go to college. even if it's after your stint in professional baseball. :) It took your Dad a while to finish, but he did it and so will you!

You Will:  have a job in high school.

You Will:  learn from the best.

You Will:  contribute to your world and be an active member in your community.

You Will:  be hugged and kissed by your family, no matter how old you might be. get over it.

You Will:  (at some point in your life) lose. struggle. All that life has to offer is worth fighting for, it will not be handed to you.

You Will:  be challenged.

You Will:  be thankful.

You Will:  Pray.

Everything we want for the two of you is written on our hearts.  The bottom line? Go for it - all of it - but do it with the intention of helping others and for your own happiness, never with the intention of being greedy.  The things that you can quantify (money, the number of friends you have, etc.) don't really matter in life.  People matter, Relationships matter, but Family always wins. 

(PS.  There are certain friends that can qualify as family, but you won't know which ones until you really know it. Trust me on this one.)

Call me Lazy

My life these days is all about convenience. What's the most efficient way to manage my family, household, work-life and lifestyle and still get to spend quality time with everyone, sleep and be happy? It's all about delegating. No, I'm definitely not my Mother's Daughter in this aspect -- she did it all and then some. I'll never know how she did it all, and made it look good. Me? I'm guilty of finding the easier road and well, I need a little help from my friends: taskrabbit, instacart and some fabulous online shopping retailers.  Sure, I could lug kids in and out of the car a bazillion times over the weekend (as they get bored and more bored) but then I'd miss the chance to lay by the pool for 15 minutes while the kids naps overlap (we haven't perfected that just yet).  Why go through all of that when I have these awesome tools at my fingertips. Remember that saying we talked about earlier, "if Mama ain't happy..." or that other one, "happy wife, happy life"?  We can keep going:  "Work smarter, not harder"! Management and efficiency can be pretty cool if you use it for good and not evil.

Now before I go filling you in on all of my little secrets, please remember that yes, I can physically do this stuff myself and I will continue to for the most part, but sometimes it's just easier this way.  Plus, even as controlling particular as I may be I'm not a really picky person and if it is something that I need specifically, then of course I do it myself.

Use these or don't -- it's nice to know that they are out there though if you ever need them. Disclaimer: all of these sites run their own background checks and no, I am not getting anything from them...these are my own thoughts.

INSTACART:

Seriously, this one is a gem! Grocery delivery based on your area! We have the option of Costco, HEB (local grocery store) and Whole Foods!  You go online and click til your hearts content on milk, eggs, produce, meat, etc. You can even put in specific requests if you want.  There's a minimal delivery fee based on your total OR you can sign up for Instaprime (sort of like amazon prime) where you pay $99 for a year of "free" delivery.  They deliver between 7am and midnight, based on the time that you request! Plus, they are trained in finding good produce/meat and if you get something that you disagree you can report it and they will refund you. I tried this service for the first time last week and let me just say:  SUPER CONVENIENT!  It was a rainy afternoon, Tucker had gotten out and I had both kids while Tim was working late and groceries (as requested) arrived 20 minutes after we got home. The way that instacart makes their money is by charging more for the individual items, but they have to make their money right?

This isn't something that I'll do all of the time, but here's my thought:  If I stock up on big grocery trips 2 times a month and then throw some smaller produce/dairy trips in via instacart as needed we should be good to go. Even better, if we're heading out of town -- order ahead of time and then throw it in a cooler before the road trip.  Or if you've been on vacation and you are coming home late on Sunday but want to be ready for the week...Instacart! If your family is sick and you need soup and crackers or pedialyte and diapers...Instacart!

TASKRABBIT:

There are a couple of different apps out there like this one, but so far this is the only one I have tried. I had something that I needed to do for Payton/Cameron at their school that required pictures. With everything going digital, I didn't have any to use so I needed prints, but couldn't wait for the shipping time so I ordered them from Target. That same day was nuts at work so I couldn't slip away at lunch to go and pick them up, nor did I want to lug the kids to Target (where I would have definitely spent more money anyway) after work. Seriously, we had dinner, bath and bedtime to deal with and really I just wasn't in the mood. So I put it up as a "job" or a task at taskrabbit. You can either put it out there with a price, or you choose to have people bid on your task. I chose to have people bid on it. Long story short, I had my pictures picked up at Target and delivered to me within an hour for $7. Seriously, genius!  The tasks can be as simple or as complex as you want them to be and sometimes when there isn't enough time in the day little things like this can make all the difference. I was able to spend my time on the project for Payton and Cameron and really, that's way better than our traveling mess zooming through Target!  Can you just imagine my tasks when they're doing their first science project? Eek. 

I've already told you about my online shopping for diapers and household items.

Next up I'll be trying my hand at the at home dry cleaning delivery. I'll let you know how it goes. :)

If you're shaking your head at my silly ways, that's ok -- we all have our preferences and we all handle things differently. 

If you're thinking to yourself, wow - that's impressive. Thanks, I admit it, I think so too!

Call me lazy, call me smart -- either way, I'm getting stuff done and still smiling.  Our world is changing and although I love the idea of perusing the grocery store and taking my time looking at every cool item at Target, I really would rather spend my time laughing with my husband, reading books with my kids or going for a run to clear my head.

Lazy is a relative term.

Breathe

You know those moments where you catch your breathe. Your stomach drops to your feet. You close your eyes and you simply listen to your heart beat? 

There's been a tragedy. Or A loss. Or A heart break. Or maybe all of the above.

Something has gone down with zero explanation and no way of fixing it.

You squeeze your kids tighter, you say extra prayers, you tell your partner again just how much you love them.

Then you think. And you can't stop thinking. In one way or another you are thinking. What would you do? What should you do? What plans should you put in place? And then you pray again.

- I almost didn't answer that phone call. -

This extra long breathe is another reminder for me and maybe the reason I answered the phone tonight was simply to write this short post and remind everyone to say what you feel. Don't wait to tell people how much you love them. Share your blessings and really live this one extraordinary life because:  

It. Is. All. A. Gift. 

All of it. Every piece of the good, the bad and the ugly - it's still a gift. 

Take the time to appreciate your gifts. Especially, especially the little people, the little miracles we are so lucky to know.

Date Night Required

Life moves too fast. This morning I read and reposted an article with 10 tips to becoming a happier person that was apparently from The Pope and I found myself cheering on every single tip.

I constantly remind myself to simplify. Everything piles up: dishes, laundry, work, junk, paperwork, toys and more stuff!

There's only so much that we really need and only so much we can do physically and mentally. Tim and I have always lived by the idea that you work hard so that you can play hard, but sometimes the working hard gets in the way of remembering to take time out to play.

Date nights, late night runs, sneaking time in for a nap or a few minutes of stillness -of calm- is crucial to that continuation of happy tips in my book. As parents a Mom, I know that my happiness comes from the happiness of my family and that typically my "needs" might be last on the checklist, because really that's just part of the job requirements. (Tim, or any other Dads that might be reading this, I'm not saying that you don't find happiness from our happiness or that yours might not come last either. I'm just saying that Mothers tend to be martyr's - I know of at least three in my life: my Mother, Grandmother and Mother-in-law.) But, and that's a big but, what's that saying:

"If Mama isn't happy, ain't nobody happy"?

Let's just say a date night, a wedding, a dance floor with good music, a glass of wine, my handsome dance partner and some good hair can make this Mama pretty happy. 

Sunsets and sparklers? That's just icing on the happy cake!

Luckily, we're extremely blessed with family that loves to hang with our boys and a couple of great sitter-options if family is busy.  There's a lot to say for a night of adult conversation, or no conversation at all and just pure silence.  I'm sure someday I'll be able to sleep past their usual morning wake up call and not check their rooms before I go to sleep.  Or will I? 

Either way... here's a bit of advice: whether the option of a date is a wedding, a trip to the grocery store or just a quick run around the block -- take it.  Seriously, even if you don't have kids -- take it! 

Date night required.  This includes dates with yourself!

Dear Nugget

Happy 4 months Payton!

Your personality is getting bigger and bolder every day.  I'm not sure how long your patience for this one crazy family you were born into is going to last, but I like it -- it's totally my speed!

Your head is getting stronger too, and I'm loving the little boy that you are quickly becoming!  Your brother laughs when you talk back to him, but I think he'll be pleasantly surprised when he actually understands something that you say.

In the beginning I thought that you and Cameron were going to look like twins, only 22 months apart, but this month I've really seen some changes.  Don't worry, there will be no denying that you're brothers.

At 4 months old: 

You recognize voices.

You laugh out loud. 

You tell stories, well at least your version of them. 

You have rolled over, but it takes you a while and you definitely work at it.

You have your Mama and Daddy terrified of going anywhere without a burp rag.

Even Cameron knows what a burp is now. 

You love to look at yourself (Benton-trait).

You love being outside and have become our honorary lifeguard when we're sitting by the pool. Either that, or you remind us of the guy from Weekend at Bernie's. 

Your ticklish.

That dimple, the one that I fell in love with the first time you cried, it's still here. I hope it stays forever.

Oh and those blue eyes? They're still here too. 

You're sleeping anywhere from 6 to 8 hours at night.  We're so close.

Have I mentioned this yet?  I cringe at what this means long-term, but I was also a thumb-sucker and I have to admit that at this stage in the game it looks adorable and I know that he's completely content - which makes Mama happy. 

I can only imagine the crazy that you and your brother are going to bring to the table for this family, but I do know this:  Your Daddy and I are going to be right there cheering, hugging and sending you to your room when the time is right. Life isn't perfect, and I'm sure we've already done something that you'll blame us for later in life, but this is all just the beginning...

For now, just eat, sleep and be merry my sweet boy. with or without the spit up.

I love you to the moon & back, 

Mom